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You’ve been invited to a wedding – yay! You may be asking yourself “how much should I spend on a wedding gift?” Well, the short answer is this: it depends. Traditionally, etiquette states that spending between $100 and $200 is appropriate for a wedding gift, but there are a few other factors to consider. Here are a few:
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First and foremost, you should never spend more than you can afford on a wedding gift. Decide how much you are able to give and do so – the couple will (hopefully) be happy you were able to share their day regardless.
Depending on your relationship with the couple, the more (or less) you may want to spend on the gift. If they are your immediate family member or even a close friend of yours, you may want to aim around the $175 per person range, however, if they are a distant relative, co-worker, or family friend, feel free to stay within the $75-$125 per person range. If you’re buying as a group though, you can opt for around the $100 dollar range since you’ll be putting it towards an even bigger gift! Here’s a little tip, this option actually helps you to save a bit more! Don’t tell the bride and groom…
It is more common nowadays for couples to live together before getting married, which means that they might already have all their plates and cutlery. It is no longer taboo for couples to request cash gifts over a traditional registry.
When gifting money, be sure to put it inside a thoughtful handwritten card and maybe include a nominal gift (like mugs). If you’re writing a cheque, be sure to check with the couple about how to fill it out so they don’t run into trouble cashing it.
If you are invited to other gifting events like the bridal shower, you will be expected to give a gift then as well. In this case, decide on your overall budget first, then allocate a percentage (less than 40%) to the bridal shower gift. Usually, bridal shower gifts are still part of a registry.
Check the registry—find out what the couple may need—that might at least help you decide what to buy, within your limits. On top of this, it is a guarantee that the gift you present will be helpful. Most registries will have items in various price ranges, so one should be able to find something that will fit in your budget yet be meaningful. This also has the added advantage of avoiding double-gifting.
Perhaps the newlyweds love cooking, kitchen gadgets, or gourmet food items. Maybe they’re outdoor enthusiasts, so perhaps camping gear or travel accessories may be appreciated. Tailoring your gift to their lifestyle shows thoughtfulness and consideration. Besides, if a couple has indicated plans for the future, like buying a house or starting a family, gifts that align with these goals can be particularly meaningful. This personal touch can make your gift stand out as both useful and heartfelt.
Again, this will depend on how close you are to the couple. If you are super close – it’s a nice gesture to send a gift anyway. If you’re not in a financial position to buy a present, sending a heartfelt card will do.
When budgeting for your gift, it is courteous to consider whether you are bringing a guest with you to the wedding. As the couple is hosting and covering your guest’s expenses, consider spending slightly more than you would if you were attending solo. This does not mean you need to double the budget, but a modest increase shows that you acknowledge the couple’s additional expense they are incurring by hosting your guest.
Are you travelling a great distance to attend the wedding, or do you have to pay for airfare, hotels, etc? If yes, take this into consideration when deciding whether or not to give an expensive gift. Some couples who have destination weddings will opt to have their guest forgo gifts.
*Please note that staying in a hotel for one night does not mean you’re off the hook!
Certain cultures have traditions of giving particular gifts or a set monetary amount as a customary practice. It’s important to respect and follow cultural traditions if the couple or their families adhere to them. This ensures your gift is appropriate for the couple and will make them appreciate it all the more. Researching or asking about these traditions or expectations can help you make an informed decision, showing the couple that you respect and honour their cultural background.
Adding a personal touch to your gift will, in turn, make it very special. You could have the couple’s initials engraved on some keepsake item, a piece of custom art, or even a scrapbook with different stages of their relationship. Personalizing your gift shows extra effort and thoughtfulness. Many times such gifts are treasured keepsakes and kept for a lifetime!
If you are on a tight budget, consider pooling resources with other guests. Group gifts enable the purchase of more significant or sentimental items without burdening anyone’s finances. This can be especially helpful for buying high-ticket items on the couple’s registry. Collaborating with friends or family members can also make the gift-giving process more fun and collaborative. By pooling resources, you can contribute to a gift that the couple might not have expected to receive, making it a pleasant and memorable surprise.
How much should I spend on a wedding gift if I am not very close to the couple?
For distant acquaintances or colleagues, spending between $100 to $150 is generally acceptable.
Is it necessary to buy a gift if I've already spent a lot on travel and accommodations?
If attending the wedding has incurred significant expenses, a modest gift or a heartfelt card expressing your congratulations and best wishes is perfectly acceptable.
What should I do if I can't afford a traditional wedding gift?
Consider giving a heartfelt, handmade gift or offering your time and assistance with wedding preparations or on the big day. Thoughtful gestures are often more meaningful than expensive presents.
Is it okay to buy a gift not on the registry?
While buying from the registry ensures the couple will receive something they want, it's perfectly fine to choose a different gift. Just make sure it's something thoughtful and suitable for the couple's lifestyle.
Can I give a group gift with friends?
Absolutely! Pooling resources with friends to buy a more substantial gift can be a great idea, especially if you all know the couple well.
When should I give the wedding gift?
You can send the gift before the wedding, bring it to the event, or within a few weeks after the event. Many people prefer to send gifts in advance to avoid the hassle of bringing them to the ceremony.
Finding the right amount to spend on a wedding gift doesn’t have to be complicated. Keep in mind the closeness of your relationship, the formality of the event, and your personal budget. The most important thing is the thought and effort you put into the gift, not how much you spend. By following these simple guidelines, you can give a meaningful gift that the couple will appreciate. Happy Gifting!
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